self-pity

I have to say it . . . I am lonely! For the last few weeks and months there has been something different in the air. It's called change and most of it is happening with my friends. Unfortunately, I only have like 5 friends (all of whom I love dearly), but I'm realizing when their lives change and take them different directions I am left without anyone to hang out with. So far I have yet to do anything about it. Sometimes I think I just sit at home and wait so that when they are ready and able to hang out I will be available because I do get my feelings hurt when they are never available to hang out. Yes, I know this sounds a little childish and selfish . . . something I am constantly struggling with, but this is my blog and my chance to express these feelings, right?

Well, here's what I've decided . . . to do something about it! We have been reading a book in my small group called "Lady in Waiting." It talks a lot about taking advantage of our singleness to drawer nearer to God and be fully devoted to Him. I think I am taking advantage of my time and improving my spiritual walk, but I'm not taking advantage of this time to meet new people and put myself out there. I'm going to start looking for more ways to do that . . . asking new people to hang out, maybe try some online dating again, who knows, but I can't go on like this. It's not their fault they are busy or going in different directions, but I don't have to just sit at home alone. So, in the words of Josie from Never Been Kissed, I'm going to grab the bull's balls and just go live life. I've got nothing to lose, right?